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A year later...


  • My heart still skips a beat when I hear the front door chime after 11pm...

  • I still look for you when I enter your room...

  • I look for you in the shadows...

  • I look at your videos multiple times through out the day just to hear your voice...

  • I look for signs that you’re around...

  • I whisper your voice...

  • I crave to hug you, hold you, and love you...

  • I’m continuously looking for answers to how I could have saved you, how I could have done better....

  • Birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays are faced without you...

  • Previously joyous occasions are now filled with grief and sadness...

  • Mother’s Day and Father’s Day were a painful reminder of your absence...

  • I find myself still picking up gifts for 4 only to painfully realize that I’m now left with 3...

  • The grief and sadness come in waves...

  • I’m angry, guilty, lonely, sad, and tired...

  • I’ve come to realize that I’ve lost my best friend and confidant...

  • There is absolutely nothing I can do to fix this...

  • I’ve disengaged in activities that remind me of you...

  • Engaging in anything fun feels like a betrayal...

  • I’m distracted and can’t focus on anything...

  • I’m exhausted from the stress of grief...

  • Things I once enjoyed now seem meaningless or unimportant...

  • I feel anxious about seeing people and socializing...

  • I feel anxious about running into grief triggers...

  • I feel anxious about becoming emotional in front of others...

  • I feel anxious about grieving for you in front of the other children...

  • I no longer feel like a capable and competent person...

  • I wish I could turn back time...

  • I keep reliving the trauma of finding you...

  • I keep reliving the past few years over and over in my head...

  • I miss you....













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